Charity begins at home. Today I have decided to become selfish. I refuse to think of anyone except myself. Not about the wife in me or about the mother in me. When will people realize that these are but extensions of a woman? I am a girl before I became a wife or a mother.
Every girl child is born with desires and ambition. But only 30% can fulfill them. The remaining hide under the mask of sacrifice and they give up their most latent desires. And this is what makes the family members happy? It's actually funny but it does. For a woman's desires are so inconsequential that they don't even merit a debate.
She sacrificed in the name of the family. Did she have a choice? She gave up her career for her family. Was it discussed with her? Why does she not get up and fight for her rights? She can. Do not consider her sacrifices as meekness. But she won't for she had seen her mother sacrificing and before her, her grandmothers.
I want to break this vicious circle of sacrifices. I want to tell my daughter that her dreams have a meaning. Yes, marriage is important but so is finding the right partner. Love is important but so is that action of a guy who gets up and says, "it's fine darling today I will take care of chutki. You go to work."
That day we can say we are celebrating woman. Stop treating us as sacrificial goats. We did not want this role. We never said we were mother India nor did we say our career and our desires are secondary. So who decided it for us?
We. We the women decided to give up our lives and cry over what could have been at the dusk of our lives. We women decided to play the role of a martyr the day we told her in-laws that it is fine, let him go to work I will take care of you. We women decided that just because we give birth to a child it is our sole responsibility. And when the child grows up and demands we make that sacrifice year in and out- why the heck are we so surprised? Is this not what we have taught him or her from day one?
I think time has come to teach the true meaning of equality to a child. Desires and wants are equal in every human. Let not a woman at the dusk of her life think about re-starting her career and finding the world has moved on. Happy Women's Day.
Phew! This was heavy even for me. :D